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CITY OF GOD |
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INTRODUCTION
1. When I was ready to present before the throne of
God the insignificant results of my labors in writing the first part of the
most holy life of Mary, the Mother of God, I wished to subject it to the
scrutiny and correction of the divine light, by which I had been guided in my
shortcomings. I was very anxious to be, consoled by the renewed assurance, and
benign approval of the Most High, and to know, whether He wished me to continue
or to abandon this work, which is so far above my lowliness. The Lord responded
saying: "Thou hast written well, and according to our pleasure; but We
desire thee to understand, that in order to manifest the mysteries and most
high sacraments of the rest of the life of our only and chosen Spouse, Mother
of our Onlybegotten, thou hast need of a new and more exalted preparation. It
is our wish that thou die to all that is imperfect and visible, and that thou
live according to the spirit; that thou renounce all the occupations and habits
of an earthly creature and assume instead those of an angel, striving to attain
in them a still greater purity and an entire conformity with what thou art to
understand and write."
2. In this answer of the Most High I understood, that
such a high perfection of life and habits and such an unwonted exercise of
virtues was proposed and required of me, that, full of diffidence, I became
disturbed and fearful of undertaking a work so arduous and difficult for an
earthly creature. I felt within myself great repugnance rising up in the flesh
against the spirit. The spirit called me with interior force, urging me to
strive after the disposition, which was required of me, and advancing as
argument the pleasure of the Lord and the benefits accruing to myself. On the
other hand the law of sin (Rom. 7, 23), which I felt in my members, opposed the
divine promptings and discouraged me by the fear of my own inconstancy. I felt
a great distaste, which deterred me and a great pusillanimity which filled me
with fear. In this excitement I began to believe, that I was not capable of
treating about such high things, especially as they were so foreign to the
condition and estate of a woman.
3. Overcome by fears and difficulties, I resolved not
to continue this work, and to use all possible means to adhere to this
determination. The common enemy knew my fear and cowardice, and, as his utmost
cruelty is more aroused against the weak and disheartened, he made use of this
very disposition to attack me with incredible fury. It seemed to him, that I
was left without help in his hands. In order to conceal his malice, he sought
to transform himself into an angel of light, pretending to be very solicitous
for my soul and for my welfare. Under this false pretext he perfidiously
deluged me with his suggestions and doubts; he represented to me the danger of
damnation and frightened me with punishments similar to those of the chief of the
angels (Is. 14, 12), since I had sought in my pride to comprehend, what was
above my powers and in opposition to God himself.
4. He pointed out to me many souls, who, professing
virtue, were deceived by some secret presumption and by yielding to the insinuations
of the devil; and he made me believe, that in so far as I sought to scrutinize
the secrets of the divine Majesty (Prov. 25, 27), I could not but be guilty of
pride and presumption, thus being already judged. He urged very strongly, that
the present times were ill suited for such matters and sought to confirm his
assertion by what happened to some well known persons, who were found to labor
under deceit and error. He reminded me of the dread of the spiritual life in
others; how great would be the discredit, which would arise by any mistake of
mine and what evil effect it would have on those of little piety; all this I
would know by experience and to my regret, if I persisted in writing about this
matter. And as it is true evidently, that all the opposition to the spiritual
life and the small esteem in which the mystic virtues are held, is caused by
that mortal enemy, so, for the purpose of doing away with Christian devotion
and piety in many souls, he succeeds in deceiving some and in sowing the cockle
among the good seed of the Lord (Matth. 13,25). Thus
he causes confusion and obscures the true sentiment concerning it, making it
more difficult to distinguish the darkness from the light. I am not surprised
to see him succeed therein, as the true discernment is the special work of God
and of those, who participate in his true wisdom, and do not govern themselves
only by earthly insight.
5. It is not easy during this mortal life to discern
true prudence from the false; for often also the good intention and zeal warp
the human judgment, when counsel and light from on high are wanting. I had
occasion to learn this in the execution of that which I am about to undertake:
for some persons, well known as devout, not only those who loved me on account
of their piety and desired my welfare, but also those who were less loving and
considerate: all alike at one time wished to deter me from this undertaking,
and also from the path, which I was going, as if I was proceeding upon it by my
own choice. Their fear of drawing discredit or confusion upon those who were
striving after piety with me, or upon religion or my neighbors, and especially
upon the convent in which I lived, caused them anxiety and to me, affliction. I
was much enamoured by the security, which the ordinary paths of the other nuns
seemed to offer; I acknowledge, that this suited more my own insight and my
inclination and desires, and was urged upon me still more by my timidity and my
great fears.
6. Cast about upon these impetuous waves, my heart
sought to reach the port of obedience in order to reassure me in the bitter sea
of my confusion. To add to my tribulation, it began to be rumored about in our
order, that my spiritual father and superior, who had for many years directed
my soul and who well understood my interior trials, who moreover had commanded
me to write the preceding part of this history, who would most likely
encourage, quiet, and console me, was suggested for removal to a higher office.
The suggestion was not acted upon, but it occasioned his absence for many days,
and the dragon took advantage of all this in order to pour out against me the
furious river of his wrath (Apoc. 13, 15). Thus, though in vain, he exerted all
his malice, on this occasion and others, to entice me from obedience and
deprive me of the guidance of my superior and master.
7. In addition to all the contradictions and
temptations already mentioned, and many others not possible to describe, the
demon sought to deprive me of my health, causing many aches, indispositions and
disorders of the whole body. He harassed me with insurmountable sadness and
conflicting thoughts; he seemed to confuse my understanding, hinder correct
thinking, weaken my will power, and sift me in body and soul. And it happened
that in the midst of this confusion I committed some faults, which were serious
enough in me, although they were committed not so much in malice as from human
frailty. Nevertheless the serpent sought to use them for my destruction more
than any other means; for thus having interrupted the flow of good works, his
fury was let loose to cause still greater faults in this embarrassment by
inveigling me to exaggerate my guilt. To this he drove me by impious and most
insidious suggestions, seeking to persuade me, that all that I had experienced
in the path which I had trodden, was false and
erroneous.
8. As these insinuations, on account of the faults
committed and on account of my continual consternation and fears, began to
appear plausible, I resisted them less than others; and it was only through the
special mercies of the Lord, that I did not fall entirely from all belief and
hope in a remedy. But I found myself so entangled in difficulties and
surrounded by darkness, that I may say, the groanings of death encompassed me
and the sorrows of hell engulfed me (Ps. 17, 5) inspiring me with dread of
extreme peril. I resolved to burn the manuscripts of the first part of this
divine history and to desist from writing the second. The angel of satan, who inspired me with this resolution, induced me also
to withdraw myself from the whole undertaking: to put an end to the pursuit of
the spiritual life, to neglect my interior life, and not to communicate about
it with anyone. Thus would I be able to do penance for my sins, appease the
Lord, propitiate Him, and retain his friendship. In order to make sure of the
effects of his concealed malice he proposed, that I make a vow not to write any
more on account of the danger of being deceived and of deceiving; but that
instead, I amend my life, retrench my imperfections and embrace penance.
9. With this masque of seeming virtue the dragon
pretended to establish his damnable counsels and cover himself with the skin of
a sheep, while in reality he acted as a bloodthirsty and devouring wolf. He
persevered for some time in this attack and all alone I remained for fifteen
days in a night of darkness, without relief or consolation either human or
divine: without the former, because I was without the help and the counsel of
obedience, and without the latter, because the Lord had interrupted the flow of
his favors, his enlightenments and continual inspiration. Above all was I
distressed by despair of salvation and in it, the persuasion, that death and
the danger of my eternal damnation was approaching; all this was instigated and
fostered in me by the enemy.
10. But as the aftertastes of his temptations are so
bitter and end but in despair, the very disturbance, by which he upset the
whole republic of my powers and acquired habits, made me more wary of fulfilling
anything which he urged on me and proposed to me. He availed himself of the
continual fear, which tormented me with the dread of offending God and of
losing his friendship and when, in my doubts, I applied myself to works of
piety, he sought to draw me away. This very fear however made me hesitate at
what the astute dragon had tried to convince me of and in this uncertainty I
deferred giving assent to it My high regard for obedience also, by which I had
been ordered to write, and the contrariness of that which I felt in my
interior, helped me to resist and to recoil at his suggestions. Above all the
assistance of the Most High defended me and permitted not the beasts to snatch
my soul, which amid sighs and groans confessed Him. I cannot describe in words
the temptations, combats, troubles, dismays and afflictions, which I suffered
in this battle: for I saw myself placed in such a state, that
in my judgment there was really no greater difference between my condition and
that of the damned, except that in hell there is no redemption, while in mine
it was still possible.
11. One day, in order to get some respite, I cried out
from the bottom of my heart saying: "0 woe is me, that
I have come to such a state! and woe to my soul, which
finds itself therein! Whither shall I turn, since all the portals of my
salvation are closed?" Immediately a strong and sweet voice gave answer
within myself:
"Whither dost thou wish to go outside of God
himself?" By this answer I perceived that my cure was at hand in the Lord,
and at the breaking of this dawn I began to raise myself from the depth of the
confusion, into which I was cast, and I felt a powerful increase in the fervor
of my desires and in the acts of faith, hope and charity. I debased myself in
the presence of the Most High and, in firm confidence in his goodness, I wept
over my faults with bitter sorrow. I confessed them many times and sighing from
the depth of heart, I began to seek again the former light and truth. And as
the divine Wisdom comes forth to meet those by whom it is invoked (Wis. 6, 17),
it advanced toward me in delight and cleared away the night of my confusion and
tormenting afflictions.
12. Presently that bright day broke, which I had
desired so much; the quiet possession of peace returned; I enjoyed the sweet
love and vision of my Lord and Master, and with it I again perceived, why I
should believe, accept and esteem the benefits and favors, which his mighty arm
wrought in me. I gave Him thanks as far as was in my power; and I saw, who I
was and who God is; that a creature by itself can do nothing,
that it is nothing, because sin is nothing. I saw also what man can do
when raised up and assisted up by the divine right hand, being much more than
can be imagined by our earthly faculites. Humbled in the perception of these
truths and in the presence of the inaccessible light, (which is vast and
strong, without deceit or falsehood), my heart flowed over in sweet affections
of love, praise and thanksgiving. For now I understood, that He had guarded and
defended me, so that in the confused night of temptations my lamp might not be
extinguished (Prov. 31, 18); and in the depth of my gratitude I annihilated
myself to the dust and humiliated myself as a worm of the earth.
13. To make this benefit more certain, I immediately
heard an interior exhortation, without knowing clearly from whence it
proceeded; while it severely reprehended me for my disloyalty and my wrongful
ways, it at the same time admonished and enlightened, instructed and corrected
me. It furnished me with a deep understanding of good and evil, of virtue and
vice, of what was secure, useful and beneficial, as well as their contraries;
it laid open to me the way of eternity, gave me a knowledge of the means and of
the end, of the value of life everlasting, and of the miserable unhappiness and
the so little considered ruin of endless perdition.
14. In the profound knowledge of these two extremes, I
confess that I was dumbfounded and cast about between the fear of my dreadful
infirmity and the desire of reaching the happiness, of which I was unworthy on
account of my demerits. I was full of the thought of the kindness and mercy of
the Most High; and the fear of losing Him: I beheld the two different ends
awaiting the creatures: eternal glory and eternal misery; and it seemed a small
matter to me to suffer all the pains and torments of the world, of purgatory
and hell itself, in order to attain to the one and to avoid the other. And
although I perceived, that the divine help is assured to those who seek to make
use of it, yet as I also saw by this light, that life and death are in our
hands (Eccli. 15, 18), and that our weakness or malice may prevent the proper
use of grace, and that the tree will lie for all eternity as it once has fallen
(Eccles. 11, 3), on this account I was overcome by the deepest sorrow, which
penetrated my heart.
15. This sorrow was increased by a most severe answer
or inquiry, which came from the Lord. For while I found myself thus annihilated
in the consciousness of my weakness and danger and by the thought of having
offended his justice, so that I dared not raise my eyes toward Him, He met my
speechless sorrow by the advances of his mercy, saying to me in answer to them:
"Which dost thou wish,
my soul? Which dost thou seek? Which of these ways wilt thou choose? What is
thy resolve?" This question was an arrow to my heart: for although I knew
for certain, that the Lord knew my desires better than I myself, the delay
between the question and the answer was incredibly painful to me; I wished, if
possible, that the Lord should anticipate my answer and should not show Himself
ignorant of the response, which I would give. But, impelled by great emotion, I
made response in words coming from the innermost of soul, and said; "Lord and
omnipotent God! The path of virtue, the way of eternal life do I chose, this do
I desire, and in this do Thou place me; and as I do not merit it in thy
justice, I appeal to they mercy, and I offer for myself the infinite merits of
thy most holy Son and my Redeemer, Jesus Christ."
16. I was made aware, that this highest Judge
remembered the promise, which is given to the Church, that He would grant all
that is asked in the name of his Onlybegotten (John 16, 23), that in Him and on
his account my petition was granted and its fulfillment hastened according to
my poor wishes. Certain conditions were made and proposed to me by an
intellectual voice, saying to me interiorly: "Soul, created by the hand of
the Almighty, if thou wishest, as one of the elect, to follow in the path of
the true light and attain the position of a most chaste spouse of the Lord, who
calls thee, it is befitting, that thou observe the laws and precepts of love.
The first thing required of thee is, that thou reject entirely all earthly
inclinations, renouncing all and every affection toward the transient things,
so that thou have no love or affection toward any created being, no matter how
useful, beautiful or agreeable it may appear to thee. Cherish no created image,
harbor no earthly affection; let thy will rest in no created object, except in
so far as thy Lord and Spouse shall command thee for the well ordering of thy
love, or in so far as thou canst be aided thereby to love Him alone."
17. "And when, after thus reaching this perfect
abnegation and renunciation of thyself, thou shalt have freed and disentangled
.thyself from all earthly things, seek the Lord, raising thyself with the swift
wings of the dove toward the high habitation, in which He, in his
condescension, wishes to place thy spirit; so that there thou mayest live in
his presence and have a secure dwelling-place. This great Lord is a most
jealous Spouse and his love and emulation are strong as death (Cant. 8, 6). He
wishes to adorn thee and set thee in a secure place, in order that thou mayest
not issue from it, or leave his presence for another, where thou findst Him not
or enjoyest not his caresses. He, with whom thou art to converse without
mistrust, wishes to sign thee with his own hand, and this is a most equitable
law, which the spouses of the great King must observe; for even those in the
world observe it, in order to show their faithfulness. It is due to the
nobility of thy Spouse, that thou observe a behavior corresponding to the
dignity and position conferred by Him, without descending to anything not
befitting this estate or making thee unworthy of the adornment lavished upon
thee for entrance into his bridal chamber."
18. "Next I require of thee, that thou despoil
thyself with diligence of the vestments torn by thy faults and imperfections,
soiled by the effects of sin, and made odious by the inclinations of nature.
His Majesty wishes to wash off the stains, to purify and renew thee with his
beauty, but under condition, that thou never lose sight of the poor and despicable
vestments of which thou .hast been divested, so that in the memory and
knowledge of this benefit, thou mayest spread the odor of sweetness for this
great King by the nard of thy humility (Cant. 1, 11), and so that thou mayest
never forget the return, which thou owest to the Author of thy salvation. Thus
will He, by the precious balsam of his blood, purify thee, heal thy wounds and
enlighten thee copiously."
19. "In addition to all this" (this voice
continued to say) "in order that thus forgetting all earthly things thou
mayest be coveted by the highest King, seek to adorn thyself with the jewels,
which He in his pleasure has prepared for thee. The vestments, which shall
cover thee, are to be whiter than the snow, more brilliant than the diamond,
more resplendent than the sun and yet they will be at the same time so
delicate, that they wilt easily be spoiled by any negligence, making thee
abominable in the sight of thy Spouse. But if thou preserve them in the purity
which He desires, thy steps will be beautiful as the Prince's daughter (Cant.
7, 1), and his Majesty will be pleased with thy sentiments and thy words. As a
cincture of thy vestment He will give thee the knowledge of his divine power
and his holy fear, in order that, having bound thy inclinations, thou mayest
direct thyself by his pleasure. The jewels of thy necklace, which adorn thy
neck, signifying thy humble submission, shall be the costly stones of faith,
hope and charity. As a clasp for thy hair (which are the high and exalted
thoughts and thy heavenly intelligences), thou wilt have from Him the infused
science and wisdom, and the embroideries of thy vestments shall be all the
beauty and richness of the virtues. Thy diligence in performing what is most
perfect shall serve thee as sandals. and thy laces
shall be the avoidance and restraints, that thou wilt use in order to keep from
evil. The rings, which will beautify thy fingers, shall be the seven gifts of
the Holy Ghost; and the beauty of thy face shall be the participation of the
Divinity, which on account of his holy love, shall shine there from. Thereto
thou shalt add the coloring of confusion for having offended Him, in order that
it may make thee ashamed of offending Him in the future, comparing at the same
time the coarse and sordid habits of the past with those that now adorn
thee."
20. "And because thy own merits would make but a
poor and miserable return for such a high espousal, the Most High wishes to
ratify this contract by singling out, as if for thee alone, the infinite merits
of thy Spouse Jesus Christ, and He makes thee a partaker of all his possessions
and treasures in the heavens and upon earth. For all belongs to this supreme
Lord (Esther 13, 11), and of all this thou shalt be mistress as his spouse for
thy own use and for the greater love of Him. But remember, soul, that in order
to obtain such a gift, thou must hide all this within thyself, without ever
losing thy secret; for I warn thee of the danger of soiling thy beauty with the
least imperfection; but if at any time thou committest such an imperfection out
of weakness, rise from it at once, like a strong one, and acknowledging it,
weep over the small fault as if it had been the most grievous."
21. "And in order that thou mayest have a
dwelling place and habitation befitting such a great estate, thy Spouse does
not wish to set thee any limit, but it is his pleasure, that thou dwell in the
infinite regions of his Divinity and that thou roam about and disport thyself
through the illimitable fields of his attributes and perfections, where the
view of the intellect is without restraint, where the will is delighted without
shadow of misgiving, and where the inclinations are satiated without
bitterness. This is the paradise always delightful, where the most beloved
brides of Christ find their recreation, where they gather the fragrant flowers
and myrrh, and where the infinite is found for those that have renounced the
imperfect nothing. There will thy habitation be secure; and in order that thy
intercourse and companionship may be in correspondence with it, I desire that
thou converse with the angels, holding them as friends and companions, and
copying from them, during their frequent conversations and intercourse with
thee, their virtues by faithful imitation."
22. "Take notice" (continued the voice)
"0 soul, of the greatness of this benefit; for the Mother of thy Spouse
and the Queen of heaven adopts thee anew for her daughter, receives thee as her
disciple, and assumes the place of a Mother and of a Teacher toward thee. Through
her intercession dost thou receive those special favors and they are all
granted to thee that thou mayest write her most holy life. On this account thou
hast been pardoned without thy merit, and that, which otherwise thou wouldst
not have reached, has been conceded to thee. What would become of thee, O soul,
if it were not for the Mother of mercy? Thou wouldst already have perished, if
her intercession had failed thee; poor and useless would have been thy works,
if, by divine condescension, thou hadst not been selected to write this
history, but the eternal Father chose thee for his daughter, in view of this
work, and for a spouse of his Onlybegotten Son; and the Son received thee to
his close embraces, and the Holy Spirit selected thee for his enlightenments.
The document of this contract and espousal is written and imprinted on the
white parchment of the purity of most holy Mary: there the finger and the power
of the Most High have written it; the ink is the blood of the Lamb; the
executor is the eternal Father; the tie which binds thee to Christ is the Holy
Spirit; the bondsmen are the merits of the same Jesus Christ and of his Mother;
for thou art but a vile worm, having nothing to offer and being expected to
give merely thy free consent."
23. So far the admonishing voice, which I heard.
Although I judged it to be that of an angel, yet whether such it was, I could
not ascertain clearly, for I did not perceive it in the same way as at other
times. Such manifestations and disclosures accommodate themselves to the
dispositions of the soul at the time of their reception, as for instance it
happened to the disciples at Emmaus (Luke 24, 16). Many other experiences I had
in order to overcome the opposition of the serpent against the writing of this
history, but it would draw out this introduction too much to mention them now.
I continued my prayers for some days, asking the Lord to govern and direct me
in order not to make a mistake, and representing to Him my incapacity and
timidity. His Majesty persisted in exhorting me to ordain my life toward all
purity and the greatest perfection, and in urging me to continue in it after
having begun. And especially the Queen of the angels intimated to me her will
many times, and with great sweetness and tenderness commanded me to obey Her as her daughter and write her most holy life, which I
had commenced.
24. To all this I wished to
add the security of obedience. Without saying anything of that, which I had
heard from the Lord and from his most holy Mother, I asked my confessor and
superior what he would direct me to do in this matter. He answered by
commanding me under obedience to continue and to write the second part of this
history. Finding myself thus compelled both by the Lord and by obedience, I
returned again to the presence of the Most High, where I found myself one day
in prayer, and, renouncing my whole self and recognizing my insignificance and
liability to err, I prostrated myself before his Majesty and said: "My
Lord, my Lord, what wishest Thou to do with me?" Whereupon
I received the following intelligence.
25. It seemed to me, that the divine light of the
blessed Trinity showed me my own self full of poverty and defects, and severely
reprehending me for them, furnished me at the same time with the highest doctrine
and salutary directions for a perfect life, and for this purpose God purified
and enlightened me anew. I became aware that the Mother of grace, most holy
Mary, standing before the throne of the Divinity, was interceding and pleading
for me. With such assistance my confidence took new life and profiting by the
clemency of such a Mother, I addressed myself to Her
and spoke to Her only these words: "My Lady and my Refuge, consider, as a
true Mother, the poverty of thy slave." It seemed to me as if She heard my prayer and speaking with the Most High, She
said: "My Lord, I wish to receive this useless and poor creature anew as a
daughter and adopt her as my own." (Truly this was the act of a most
liberal and mighty Queen!) But the Most High answered:
"My Spouse, for such a great favor as this, what
does this soul bring in return? She does not deserve it, being a useless and
destitute worm, and thankless for our gifts."
26. O wonderful power of the divine word! How shall I
describe the effects produced in me by this answer of the Allpowerful? I
humbled myself to the depth of my nothingness and I was filled with the
knowledge of the misery of creatures and of my own ingratitude toward God. My
heart sank within me in sorrow for my sins and in the desire of obtaining the
unmerited happiness of being the child of that Sovereign. I raised my eyes full
of dread to the throne of the Most High and my visage was transported in fear
and hope; I turned toward my Advocate, and desiring to be admitted as her
slave, since I did not merit the title of daughter, I spoke from the bottom of
my heart without forming any words; and I heard the great Lady say to the Lord:
27. "Divine Lord and my God, it is true, this
poor creature has nothing to offer to thy justice, but I offer for her the
merits and the blood, which my most holy Son poured out for her and with it I
present also the dignity of Mother of thy Onlybegotten Son, which I received
from thy ineffable kindness, all the works, which I performed in thy service in
having borne Him in my womb, and nourished Him with the milk of my breast, and
above all I offer Thee thy own bounty and Divinity; I earnestly entreat Thee to
consider this creature as my adopted daughter and disciple for whom I will
stand security. Under my guidance She will amend her
faults and perform her works according to thy pleasure."
28. The Most High, (may He be eternally praised for
hearing the petition of the great Queen interceding for the least of his
creatures), yielded to these prayers, and immediately in the joy of my soul I
felt immense effects, such as are impossible to describe; with my whole heart I
turned toward all the creatures of heaven and earth, and, not being able to
contain my exultation, I invited them to exalt for me and with me the Author of
grace. It seemed to me that I addressed them in the following words: "0 ye
inhabitants and courtiers of heaven and all ye living creatures, formed by the
hand of the Most High, behold this marvel of his liberality and mercy and bless
and exalt Him for all eternity, since He has raised from the dust the most vile
of the universe and has enriched the most destitute; He has honored the most
unworthy, though He is the highest God and the powerful King. And since you,
sons of Adam, here see the poorest orphan succored, the greatest sinner
pardoned; issue forth from your ignorance, raise yourself from your
listlessness and renew your hope; for if his powerful arm has assisted me, if
He has called and forgiven me, all of you can hope for your salvation; and if you
wish to assure yourselves of it, seek, seek the protection of the most holy
Mary, ask Her for her intercession, and you will find Her to be the Mother of
ineffable mercy and clemency."
29. I turned also to this most exalted Queen and said
to Her: "Aye, O my Lady, now I do not call myself an orphan, since I have
a Mother, and a Mother, who is the Queen of all creation; I shall not any more
be ignorant, since I have as Teacher the Mistress of divine wisdom, not poor,
since I have as Lord Him, who is Master of all the treasures of heaven and
earth; I have a Mother, who protects me; an Instructress, who teaches and
corrects me; a Mistress, who commands and governs me. Blessed art Thou amongst
all women, wonderful among all creatures, admirable in heaven and on earth, and
let all confess thy greatness with eternal praises. Since it is not easy or
possible for the least among creatures, the lowest worm of the earth to give
Thee any return: receive it then from the divine right hand and in the divine
vision, where Thou standest in the presence of God enjoying Thyself through all
eternity: I shall remain thy acknowledged and bounden slave, praising the
Almighty as long as my life shall last, since his liberal mercy has so favored
me, as to give me my Queen as my Mother and Teacher. Let my loving muteness
praise Thee, since my tongue has not words or terms adequate for doing it; for
all of them are strained and limited."
30. It is not possible to describe what the soul feels
during such mysterious favors. They were the source of great good to my soul,
for immediately I was made aware of a perfection of
life, and of works for which I fail to find terms. But all this, the Most High
told me, was given to me on account of the most holy Mary and in order to write
her life. It was intimated to me, that by ratifying this blessing, the eternal
Father chose me to manifest the sacraments of his Daughter; that the Holy
Spirit poured out his light and inspirations that I might declare the hidden
gifts of his Spouse; and that the most holy Son appointed me to manifest the
mysteries of his most pure Mother Mary. And in order that I might become
capable of this work, the Holy Trinity enlightened and bathed my soul in a
special light of the Divinity and the divine power touched up my faculties as
with a pencil, furnishing them with new habits for the perfect execution of
this work.
31. The Most High also commanded me to strive to
imitate with all my heart, according to my weak powers, all that I should
understand and write about the heroic virtues and the most holy operations of
the heavenly Queen, guiding my life according to her example. Knowing how unfit
I am for the fulfillment of this obligation, the same most kind Queen offered
to me anew her favor, help and instruction for all that the Lord commanded and
pointed out to me. Then I asked for the blessing of the most holy Trinity in
order to begin the second part of this heavenly history. I felt that all three
persons of the Godhead conferred their blessing upon me. Issuing from the
trance, I sought to wash my soul in the Sacraments and, full of contrition for
my sins, in the name of the Lord and of obedience, I set myself about this work
for the glory of the Most High and for his most holy Mother, the ever
immaculate Virgin Mary.
32. This second part comprises the life of the Queen
of the angels from the mystery of the Incarnation to the Ascension of Christ
our Lord into heaven, which is the principal and the
most important part of this history, for it includes the whole life and mysteries
of the Lord himself with his Passion and most holy Death. I wish only to remark
here, that the graces and blessings conceded to most holy Mary in preparation
for the Incarnation, began to flow from the moment of
her Immaculate Conception; already at that time, in the intention and the
decree of God, She was the Mother of the Word. But in the
measure as the realization of the Incarnation drew nigh, the favors and gifts
of grace continued to increase. Although they seemed to be all of the
same kind and nature from the beginning, yet they continued to augment and
increase; and there are not terms new and varied enough to equal in their
significance these increases and advances in the blessings conferred. Thus it
becomes necessary in this narrative to measure all by the infinite power of the
Lord, who, giving much, retains enough to give infinitely more, while the
capacity of each soul, and especially the soul of the Queen of heaven, is in
its way infinite, being able to receive ever more and more. And this happened
with the soul of holy Mary, until She arrived at a
summit of holiness and participation of the Divinity, to which no other
creature has attained nor will ever attain in all eternity. May the Lord
himself enlighten me, that I may follow up this work
according to his divine pleasure. Amen |